I am a proud metal head. I grew up during the rise of thrash and death metal in the mid 80's. People would say that all metal was Satanic and promoted evil. Even years later, I would hear the dismissive "haven't you outgrown that music?" from elders.
Yes, my generation was drawn to it, in part, due to it's rebellious nature, and yes, it was absolutely angry. The riffs, the drums, the lyrics — really fucking angry. But, it saved me.
In the 80's, a disabled kid living in the suburbs was the prime target for bullying. Not hurting someone's feelings, which qualifies for bullying now, but real bullying. A football jock shoving me up against a fence at the bus stop, then trying to feed me a stick with dog shit on it. That type of bullying. The kids who didn't bully me, ignored me… except for one group of kids.
The burn-outs. The metal heads. Bad influences? Sure. But who's worse: the popular high school football star who bullied a disabled kid half his size mercilessly or the long hair, heavy metal listening kid with bad grades who showed compassion?
These kids — these bad influences — introduced me to bad music. Metal. I was already into heavier music like Van Halen and Deep Purple, but I was soon introduced to Metallica, Megadeth, Iron Maiden, Led Zeppelin, and yes — Black Sabbath. I grew my hair long. I wore black t-shirts. I started to learn to play the guitar (poorly, mind you). You know what I didn't do?
I didn't kill anyone. I didn't kill myself. Because I had metal. I had an outlet for my anger. I had the love of my parents, too — don't get me wrong — but I sincerely believe the music saved me.
No, I never out-grew it.
Yesterday, an icon of metal died. Correction: the icon of metal died. The Godfather of Heavy Metal. The Prince of Darkness. Ozzy Osbourne. There's no question that Ozzy, along with Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, and Bill Ward started the genre that made my teenage years manageable. Every heavy band out there cites Ozzy and Sabbath as their influence. As Kerry King of Slayer once said (and I paraphrase): if they say they weren't influenced by Black Sabbath, they are lying.
The album Paranoid came out a year before I was born, but it was one of my favorite albums. I wore out my cassette, along with Ride the Lightning. I finally saw Sabbath live at Ozzfest in — it was either 2007 or 2008 — the year that they sold tickets for $10. Ozzy was amazing. He always was. He always put it all out there for the fans. Even his last show. He was too sick to be there… but he was there anyways. Only two weeks after what was billed as his last ever performance, he passed on.
Rest in peace, John "Ozzy" Osbourne. You will go down in music history as one of the greatest. And, you saved at least one young kid from himself.
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